Humans are designed as social animals that needs to interact with its fellow being on a daily basis. As a social being we must learn to interact with people at all times without problem, any time and any where.
Some research have previously shown that loneliness can be prevalent throughout society amongs some class of people; for instance, among people in marriage, relationship, family, and people who have successful careers. I believe this to some extent because you can be married or in relationship and still be very lonely. You can have a successful career or a good job and still be lonely. The truth is, there is nobody in this world, that doesn't have one problem or the other to solve either directly or indirectly. because the human brain is programmed to solve a problem. If you think, you don't have any problem, that in itself, can also be a problem for others to question your state of being and happiness. Even our God the the creator of the Universe Constantly Has Problems to solve. We all feel lonely at some point in our lifes. It is
only when we do not control our emotions in our lonely state, that it becomes a problem.
I HAVE IDENTIFIED 7 POWER POINTS TO OVERCOME LONELINESS;
1). Go out as often as possible, Remember Loneliness is associated with people with very passive state of minds. if we let loneliness eat deep into our minds this could lead to depression. And depression kills faster than malaria. Going out of our closet, could help us fight loneliness. There is nothing as good as going out and enjoying every moment as it passes. Dress up and look nice, go to a Restaurant, A Café, The Cinema, Go around your surroundings, even the World, and Be adventurous.
I remember vividly when I just relocated to Germany, sometimes I felt lonely because I was missing my family and friends in Lagos-Nigeria, each time I remember a happy memory, I felt more lonely. Since I was new in Germany, I had no one to talk to apart from my husband, who works for over 12 hours (Monday-Friday).
All that changed the moment I started going out, I became a different person, I got to meet and
talk to people and I got to know more about my community. For Me, the only reason why there are not many cases of depression in Nigeria (Africa) is because the people know how to have a good time. They enjoy life to the fullest, no matter the Circumstance. Thereby, managing their stress level and fighting loneliness.
2). Make your family your friends: Developing good relationship with our family is very key. This enables us share some of our deepest fears without the fear of being judged or ridiculed. It also fosters a stronger bond. The time shared with family is priceless.
3). Meet New People and Talk: Tell your problems or pour your heart to a stranger; if this gives you the security of protecting yourself, without being tagged with your problem, Then why not.
telling it to a total stranger is the best. Sometimes, we meet people for the first time, and it looks like we have known them
for ages. I have met people in the Café, Resturants, Train and even while walking in the forest and we talk about everything like we were best friends and in the end everyone goes their separate ways. Isn't that amazing, that we can talk with strangers because we don't get to see each other again and the memories goes on. "Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others"- Philippian 2:4
4). Read your bible and join a group: Still the thought, of always thinking about
yourself. instead read your bible and meditate on it. Get a place Where you can volunteer. Focus on helping others. When you help others you feel accomplished, that way you pay less attention on your lonely thoughts. Do good for others, wish others well in life, also smile at people when you go out, what a great joy it brings. Don't forget a little kindness goes a long way.
5). Make new friends: Find new people you share the same interests with. Having people of the same personality, is a natural way for beginning a good friendship because you naturally push and drive each other. Cut off from any one who drags you
down or people with negative energy.
6). Love yourself. Take good care of yourself and always look good. I think loneliness sometimes comes from the feeling of rejection, thoughts of not being who you would like to be, or being in a wrong relationship, or not having anyone appreciating you. Looking good will make us look attractive to other people and the feeling that comes from getting complements, Is Amazing.
One of the victim of depression i'm working with at my place of work; I saw her yesterday looking very good, and I said to her you look good today and she smiled and said someone else told her same and she was very happy about it. I really wish her quick recovery from her state of loneliness. She had isolated herself for over one one year without coming out or talking to people. Now, she is getting better and I always look forward to meeting with her every friday.
Loneliness is painful and it can make you begin to feel that you are an outcast, you just have to
love yourself and accept who you are because that is how nature has made you. Don't compare your life with that of others.
7). Pray: Praying can never be over emphasized, it does good like fine wine.
Written by Queendaline Schneider.
